things ive been thinking about tonight...
i dont think im very good at seeing the world how God sees it. but i want to be.
i wish i had more money so that i could give to more causes and i wish i had more time so i could serve in more ministries; God is doing amazing work in so many different places and i really want to be a part of all of them.
i want to empower kids to change the world. not just tell them they can, but teach them that they can.

after nine years of walking with Jesus what im learning is that prayer really works. i feel like maybe ive learned this before, but i think i forgot. i dont think im going to elaborate other than to say God is doing really cool things around me and its fun to get to watch.

we started a new blog for young life in the diablo valley to share what God is doing in our different ministries with anyone that wants to hear them, if youre one of those people you can check them out at
http://younglifediablovalley.blogspot.com/
the stories ive posted have san ramon in the title, but the other stories are really encouraging as well. check them out.

this is long overdue...
i moved home. home being a weird word because i think i lost all sense of it after living away, but im hoping soon that this will start to feel like home again. life here is good, really good but it's still really hard. i miss europe like crazy...i miss my friends and i miss traveling. but life here really is good, i mean it. God has been so incredibly faithful to me. stepping out in faith and moving home even though i didnt have heath care, or a full time job or a home was scary as heck but God has provided (i still dont have heath care or a full time job, yay for fundraising, but God has taken care of my needs with every step). i keep waiting for the bomb to drop and for life to get miserable (they say moving home is harder than moving away) but it hasn't yet and ive just been kind of 'in awe' at how easy it all has been. especially young life, i dont feel like ive been trying that hard but God has just been bringing all the pieces together anyway and its really awesome. we have volunteers (a team of 10!), student leaders (seven from all different churches, we didnt even plan on having student leaders), homes to meet in, parents that help buy club supplies (because we have no money), local businesses that want to partner with us to help us raise our funds for camps, and we are a campus club so the volunteers and i get to hang out on campus every wednesday at lunch! while i would love to take credit for all (or even part) of that i can honestly say that all of those things had nothing to do with me. God hooked it up, but that's the kind of awesome God we serve.

i move home in barely over a week (july 12th), i wish i was more excited. i think i will be after all of the goodbyes are over. on a happier note, we just got back from both weeks of beach break and they were great. especially middle school week. i got the opportunity on the trip to pray with a student (one that i talked about in my december-ish newsletter that wasnt interested in Jesus) as she gave her life to the Lord. and then the next morning i got to hear another beautiful confession of faith coming out of a middle school students mouth as she became a follower Jesus. it was beautiful. so many kids came to know Jesus during the middle school week...there were at least 10 from our group alone. and the cool thing is that they were all so pumped about it that on the 14 hour bus ride back there were so many middle school kids reading their Bibles and asking questions about their new faith. the two girls that i had the opportunity to pray with had their bible open and since they didnt know much about how to read it they had started in genesis. i walked up and saw them and suggested that they maybe read matthew and get to know Jesus a little first and then explained to them how the Bible isnt a book that you have to read front to back and its ok to skip around, i also explained what some of the different parts are about. a couple minutes later i walked back over to them and they were reading matthew out loud to each other, as i came up they had just read how Jesus was born of a virgin and were giggling over the word 'virgin.' middle school kids make me laugh.

im a terrible blogger. so i'll hit the highlights. poland was great, hopefully if youre a donor you got my newsletter. after poland i had a week in germany and then i went to israel for a week. i had a couple days back and then headed to southern france. after france i was back in spangdahlem for like two days and then headed to a conference for work in southern germany where i was officially goodbyed (its a time when people get to share stories and thoughts with people that are leaving staff...kind of like a verbal yearbook). then after a couple days my friend caroline came in from tennessee for like five days or so and then i headed "home" to california for a week for lauren and tonys wedding which brings us to the present. sorry i have been such a terrible blogger but my life really has been crazy. on top of all of that ive also been fundraising for my new job and trying to finish well with friends and kids and life in germany. please pray for my transition, its a lot thats going on. and my life will continue to be crazy when i get back (we still have our high school and middle school outreach camp this month and then i move back to california july 12th).

sea of galilee

jerusalem from the mt of olives

hezekiah's tunnels

tel aviv market

making sombreros at club

human pinata

sheila on a zipline in andorra

carcassone, france

in the monte carlo in monaco (think james bond)

meghan and the inside of a sheep


thats all for now.

even after living here for three years there are still things that i havent gotten used to. like the fact that this is our base's mission.

this is the welcome mat outside of our bowling alley. no joke.

on a different note we leave for poland tonight with the kiddos. i'm kind of dreading the bus ride (about 20 hours in a bus) but i'm really excited about the girls in my group, they are so fun. if you're the praying type pray for sleep on the bus ride, pray for good conversations with students. pray for the two girls in my group that dont know Jesus that they might come to understand what He did for them this week. pray for our students to come back with a bigger understanding of our God and the value of serving. also pray for unity and fun among our team and the other groups from around europe that will be in poland with us. thanks for praying.

i have a good life. and a lot of fun things have been happening but i wish to share three of them (for now).

first, laura and alyssa came out to visit, they were only here for two nights but it was fun hanging out with them and adventuring around germany, france and luxembourg.

second, and this one is big, i bought a one way plane ticket for july 12th back to california. everything has been approved for me to come back and do young life in san ramon (!) so i'm now in the fundraising stage and assuming all the funds come in i will start august 1st (so if you are one of my current donors reading this start praying about if you want to continue your support after i leave germany and i will be contacting you personally in the next couple months). to answer the question that seems to be coming up about how i feel about all of this, my answer is that its bittersweet, i'm sad to leave my life, friends, and kids here but i'm so excited about the ministry in san ramon so ya, bittersweet.

third, for those of you that know meghan marell you might know that she is coming out here to be our summer intern, she gets in on wed and leaves july 12th with me. she will be here in time for our service project to poland and will leave after our beach break to italy. its good stuff. (and if youre the praying type pray for her time here and God would use her and teach her lots.)
thats it for now.

in trier with laura and alyssa



in metz, france

ive been volunteering at the teen center (kids ages 9-18 can go there to hang out) and today i had a funny conversation with a 4th grader named jade. it went something like this:
jade: "are you married?"
me: "no"
jade: "good. i dont want to be married. i dont need a man and i dont want to deal with all that"
me: "thats very independent of you"
jade: "ya, but i still want kids so i'll adopt, cuz i dont want to deal with the whole pregnancy thing, and i dont want to do something gross with a boy"

it made me laugh. i wanted to tell her to write that in a journal and look at it in 10 years...but i didnt.

just wanted to share that little moment in my life with you all.


jade and me with our clay dogs we made.

so i said that i'd keep y'all posted on what happened with soccer. i went to the coach on tuesday to see if it was just a misunderstanding and she told me that she really didnt want my help. i was pretty bummed but i know that its not because of anything i did (or didnt do). i'm trusting that God has a reason for that which makes it a little easier. so thats the update. kind of a bummer.
on a better note we had an open mic night on tuesday at club and it was really awesome, the kids did great. and then we showed a short lou giglio clip and i spoke about how God is a big God but He's also a God of details and design. i often wonder if kids really pay attention but tonight God let me have a bit of affirmation and while we were talking about something completely different one of the girls was like 'ya, God loves us so much He even put this cross shaped protein in us to help hold us together' it was cute. and i'm thankful for moments like that when God lets us see that He doesnt need us but still chooses to work through us.

middle school club

peeps baseball at the lock-in

mini golf at the lock-in

just starting to snow

joe during our battle for the most awkward dance move

samzies chapstick

"games with adam" (we had put games with adam on the schedule for the lock-in from 7-8am but adam was far too tired to run them so this became 'games with adam')

driving home the next morning

i legitimately spent a saturday night playing the game of life with some friends

open mic night

i dont know whats wrong with me but i have not been sleeping at all recently. i think i have this tendency to get really excited about things and then not be able to sleep. but i am excited about a lot of things in my life right now. i'm excited about Jesus; God has been answering my prayers like crazy and ive been really enjoying time spent with Him. i'm excited about new friends and the boldness God has been giving me in relationships with old friends, i feel like ive really been learning how to be a friend recently. i'm excited (and a little nervous) about our lock-in on friday (pray that kids will come and not be sketchy). i'm excited about the kids coming on our poland trip. i'm excited about the fact that laura and alyssa are coming out to see me at the end of the month. i'm excited that meghan marell and rob calame are thinking/praying about coming out to be interns during the spring/summer-ish time. i'm excited that its been sunny for three days in a row. i'm excited about the next steps in my life and the fact that we have started the fundrasing process for young life at dougherty (oh hey, thats some new and big news for some of you...as of now i'm planning on coming back mid-july...yay! so thats the plan unless God changes it..but i'm pretty sure its His anyway).
but all of this excitement has equated to lack of sleep, which isnt good (especially with the lock-in coming up).

i really want to leave you with that as most of it is happy news but i do have a prayer request for those of you that like to pray about things...
for the last two years ive coached soccer at the high school, its my favorite part of everything that i do. (its 6 days a week with kids playing soccer, whats not to love?) but we got a new coach this year and i emailed her asking if i could help out again and she didnt seem real excited about having any help. so pray either that God would soften her heart to the possibility or that i wouldnt be too bummed about not helping out. i'll keep you all updated on how it turns out.

now some pictures:

rock climbing in ramstein

our knights at mideval club

jousting at mideval club

pumpkin gnocchi in balsanno del grappa, italy (where the liquor grappa comes from)

on our way to asiago, italy (where the cheese comes from)

these are for real baby foods

really big cheese wheel in asiago italy

up there with the grossest games ever...i was sick so i couldnt smell these but then all of a sudden it didnt matter that i couldnt smell, i could taste it. i almost puked.


thats all for today folks.

God provided a car. might just be a temporary solution but i'm grateful for it.
i was invited by one of our student leaders to attend his swearing in ceremony as he enlisted into the navy today. it was interesting and really cool that he asked me to be a part of such a huge event. heres a picture, it's a little rough and not that exciting but i couldnt figure out how to post the video.
and one of my favorite pictures from club on tuesday

i need a car. or i need someone with an extra car to let me borrow theirs. and this all needs to happen in the next 24 hours or i will not be able to get to base. please pray for this, or maybe for a solution i havent thought of yet. thanks.

ive been feeling hopeful recently. and like i'm on the brink of something really good with God. i'm also pretty confident that my time in europe and with the military is coming to an end, i still don't know what's next but those are the parts that feel like the Lord has been revealing to me recently.

i'm hoping that most of my blog readers know this by now (as most of you are my donors) but in case you dont (first i'm sorry for not getting the news to you sooner and second) i'm staying in germany. the plan as of now is to be in germany till july/august and then move somewhere new to take a higher position in young life as of summer. some of the places that have been thrown around are japan, south korea, delaware, colorado or san ramon. now normally i wouldnt be this honest in a blog (not that i lie to you all, its just normally not the place that feel is appropriate to share the deepest desires of my heart, however, i feel like i really need the prayer on this one) my greatest desire (concerning a young life placement) is and has always been to come "home" (seems silly saying that after my last post) but i want to come back to san ramon and start young life here. i have for quite sometime. the problem is the economy sucks. bad. and there is no money to hire me. and there hasn't been. and i thought God had closed that door, and i had a peace about that. but now that door is open again, not very wide...but open. and i dont know if God is telling me to walk through it or not. and this is where i need so much prayer as i just dont know if my heart can take it if that door closes again (i know i have to trust that God wont give me more than i can handle but its still hard). there is nothing i desire more than to be at the center of God's will for me but this keeps popping up, in my heart, in my prayers, in by head. but there are like a million obstacles, a lot of people have to say "yes" and even if that happens there is still no money so id have to raise it. and i trust that God can provide but it's a Lot of money.
so pray for me. pray for my heart, not that God would protect it but that my greatest desire would be for the things God has for me (be it san ramon or elsewhere). and if it's here (san ramon) pray that God would provide. i know He's bigger than money and bigger than the economy and that He provided for me to get to germany. but it's a lot of money so i feel like that necessitates a lot of prayer...and maybe some rich friends :).
thanks.

today gary told me this:
"God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him."
and i liked it.


ive also realized that i greatly lack a strong sense of home. which i guess is both frustrating and comforting (as are most things in my life). germany isnt home (sadly it never has been) but here (california) doesnt feel like home any more either. my friend erika said that the fact that no where really feels like "home" is just a good reminder that this really isnt our home, i sometimes struggle with cliche christian things like that but the more i think about it the more i'm comforted by the fact that i dont feel comfortable.

i suck at blogging. here are some pics since my last post...

they guys after student leadership decided it would be fun to try to push a car up a hill at my house (strength training)

taking the middle schoolers to the trier christmas market (notice the creepy man in the back...he's not with our group)

at club beyonds tacky sweater party

when the movers came and took all of our stuff
my old neighborhood on moving day

snowboarding

singing christmas carols at the hospital (germans dont do that so they really enjoyed us doing that for them)

christmas eve, making snowmen at my new house

the road to base (trying to capture the feel of where i live)

new years in cologne


girls night with the high school kiddos

trains in bratislava

at a market in budapest (so gross!)

in budapest


at the thermal baths in budapest





in bratislava (slovakia)


playing in ikea

middle school club
louis and rachel at louis' return from deployment

metz, france




clubbin at club


you've now been updated...kinda